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Fear of rejection shapes children's peer group behavior

Imagine you're a child in a classroom, and your teacher tells everyone to form groups for a project. You sit and wait, watching as other kids pair up and wondering if anyone will pick you.

This fear of rejection—familiar to many children and adults—can significantly impact how kids behave in their peer groups, according to from the University of Georgia published in The Journal of Early Adolescence.

The study found that children who feel anxious about being rejected are more likely to conform to academic expectations like studying harder or following classroom rules. They're also less likely to engage in troublemaking behaviors. On the other hand, children who actively expect rejection tend to resist conforming to both academic behaviors and popular trends.

Rejection sensitivity refers to two categories of reactions to potential rejection: rejection expectancy, a cognitive tendency to expect rejection, and anxious or angry anticipation, the emotion felt when anticipating rejection.

"Rejection sensitivity is a really concerning characteristic in children," said Michele Lease, a professor in the Mary Frances Early College of Education's department of educational psychology and co-author of the study. "When children are rejection sensitive, they might worry and become withdrawn or feel angry and become hostile. If they're trying to fit in and not get rejected, they might learn to conform, ingratiate themselves or be less assertive. Rejection sensitivity is also a good predictor of depression, even before the onset of symptoms."

The research, led by recent UGA graduate Cayenne Predix, involved more than 350 fourth and fifth grade students. Participants completed questionnaires with scenarios to measure how likely they were to follow their friends' behaviors in three areas: academics, trend-following and troublemaking.

"As a social developmental task, what's happening at this age is children are trying to learn how to navigate their entire peer network, including their status within their friend group, and that's a very unique time for trying to understand how kids feel about their place in the group," said Lease. "It's not that they don't have good friendships, they do—they play, they do other things, but at this age one of their primary tasks is learning how to fit in."

Interestingly, witnessing relational victimization, including gossiping or bullying, did not consistently influence children's conformity across behaviors. Instead, children's emotional and cognitive reactions to potential rejection were the strongest predictors of whether they would follow group norms.

Specifically, anxious children were more inclined to avoid disruptive actions and match their peers' positive academic behaviors, such as studying more or participating in class. Conversely, those who expected rejection were less likely to conform academically or socially.

"Overall, the study's findings underscore the need to consider both the emotional and cognitive aspects of rejection sensitivity when investigating conformity, especially in the context of relational aggression within friendship groups," Lease said.

Lease and her research team including Mihyun Kim, UGA doctoral candidate, and Kyongboon Kwon, University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee professor, are continuing their research to explore how friendship group norms influence sensitivity to rejection and conformity.